This is a dream, definitely a dream.
These people around me, screaming and cheering, all of them ecstatic but I remain emotionally stoic. They’re giving a standing ovation to…to…I can’t see. I was zoning out, my mind wasn’t in focus, and I feel this therapeutic air of reticence about myself. I don’t want to speak out or to express too much emotion, I’m scared of the consequences. People are gonna ask excitedly, “which part of the ladder are you at right now?” and I’ll stammer out a response.
I feel dreary on a sunny Saturday. It must be a dream, what am I doing around all these high achievers? Why do they even bother themselves with me? I’ll probably be better off eating my food, keeping to myself. The inferiority complex is real, it can be imposed on someone due to circumstances, and I am feeling it right now. It came in a rush of sentiments I can’t even begin to explain. It’s uncanny that these people used to be just like me, normal and lost enough, but through their skill and hard work, they are where they are right now. Standing up, in the mood and living the atmosphere.
A storm is brewing, and my mouth is sour. Is this jealousy I taste, or the remnant juices of that one bad orange I accidentally picked out? Seems like the same dream all over again. I thought it was over after Saturday, but no. Life seems to want to remind you of your not so glorious past, it wants you to taste your failures and will continue to haunt you. Now it is more like a nightmare, and reality is screaming out my deepest fears.
I don’t want this.
If there is an alternate reality, I would want the me in there to more successful. I want him to be living his dream. Not like this rugged, dejected self feeling inferior here.
I blinked and looked around me again. Those people are still around and festive, still jovial from the founder’s speech and performances. They’re all staring at me, with hope in their eyes, looking on to me. It’s hope that makes us still live on and believe there is something for everybody out there, something that can change us and help us. It’s what that lets us sleep in peace, devoid of nightmares, and wake up in the morning with dreams of a brighter future.
I am that hope.
Somewhere along, you will lose your way, but fear not! Because there is always a path to walk, always a path to be found, always something, somebody to look up to. And if all else fails, there’s always the inferiority complex that can drive you to be a high achiever.